Understanding our own sexuality—our fantasies, desires, preferences, needs—is an essential part of creating such a life, whether alone or in a relationship. Ideally, partners should be able to communicate with each other about their sexual fantasies and desires; however, people can face many barriers to such honesty. Given the stigma and shame surrounding sexuality, many people are unable to reveal their sexuality to their partners, or even themselves. Questions remain unanswered. Paths become blocked. Sometimes, we do not even know what we want, much less how to ask for it. Sometimes, our desires change—what was once sexy and desirable becomes boring, or, perhaps a partner sparks a new fantasy. Sometimes, we change—our life circumstances, our health, our bodies.
Coaching can light up the dark corners of our sex lives, giving us an opportunity to evaluate the thoughts and fantasies we’ve hidden away—and decide what to do with them. Coaching can also help us expand our horizons, explore new territory, and bring more enjoyment into our lives and relationships.
We take an open-minded, but balanced, approach to sexuality. Rather than judging certain sexual practices, attitudes, or identities as healthy or not, we help you explore how your sexuality is integrated into your life and relationships. Too often, sexual preferences, experiences, or fantasies are understood as “good” or “bad.” We believe that sexuality is complicated, but can be understood.
When it comes to the erotic realm, we are lifelong explorers. We have experience with many alternative sexual communities, as well as with adult entertainment, professional domination, and erotic couples’ events and tourism. Navigating through a variety of sexual “cultures” has taught us many things about the nature of desire that hold true whether you choose a non-traditional path, a monogamous marriage, or something in-between.